There’s a certain amount of power in letting go of what could have been for what will be. In believing that the desires of my heart are known, that God wants to give me those, and much more than I could ever dream.
Right now the process of letting go hurts, there are lots of tears and darkness, a lot of hiding from people BUT in the end I know that the process refines me. Makes me stronger, my vulnerability isn’t weakness, it’s human. I don’t know how this turns out. I can’t see how it turns out great but open palms Misty, open palms. I’m not meant to understand everything and probably best I don’t. Let me chase this life. Without hesitation knowing what’s meant to enter my life will enter at the TIME it’s supposed to.
I spent part of the past week at the beach for a friend’s wedding. Effectively taking time away from life. Time to rest, to lay in the sun, to laugh with friends (which is a post for another day), and even cry a little. Time to think over and accept what I think God’s been telling me for a while. To walk away. It doesn’t mean I love any less, just means me spending my energy in other ways and love differently. That God will do the work I was trying to do. It means I’m going to pray and love, from a distance.
There are plenty of changes happening right now. That if you had told me 11 months ago were happening I would have told you that was crazy talk. I think that’s how God works though. Life’s never going to be perfect. There will always be transitions, always changing parts, and new people entering our life. I want to learn to live with a heart that just gives during ALL seasons knowing that’s what I meant to do. While at times things feel dark I know the light is there, and shining. That the darkness is trying to keep my from my destiny and I can’t let that happen. My life is meant to be great, and I’ve got some amazing people pushing me towards that greatness.
I’ll finish by pointing out a line from a devotional reading the other day that has become a beacon — “Noah and his wife were in the middle of a storm they did not understand, but they waited for the Lord, trusting Him to be their refuge and strength.”
Life is good, let me live that way CONTINUOUSLY in all circumstances. Let me love openly, with open palms and run forward to see what the plan is, trusting Him as my refuge.